Sunday, May 31, 2009

old man river is no lady

Maybe you'd think I'd forget about you
that will never be
too much has transpired
prespirated too
sweated out melted pits
hard grind steadied nerves
routed out grouted
etched words and worlds
recreational creation
worlds aways from where
i wanted to be with you

if its too tough
if its too rough
no smooth edges anywhere
if there's no smooth groove
if things aren't happenin'
if you just can't make it happen ever
no matter how hard you try for at least
a year than you really are no where
no way
no how

where are you going to go
when life blurs
refuses to clear
you're stuck in another rutte
like moose in the spring mud
nodding from boredom on and off to sleep
when do i get off
waiting for something to happen
hey it wont happen
if you're in the wrong space
you just dont get it!

so move on
old man river
get on your way
down that highway
your road or mine?
you took the opposite direction
how could i possibly keep up
just dont meet me in the middle
of St. Louis, somewhere?
although i really want it (to be) too
and i really really really tried
to love you forever (I do)
forever said no Jose wasnt right for me
although i really really really wanted
he just kept saying "no way"
so what in the hacinenda was I suppose to do?

you're not in the right space
move to where you can be
commercial free
for your soul's enjoyment
i wrote about the others
because I would soon forget
a lost memory moment
i becoming an old hag
without an old hag's bag
that's a guy
so what to do when I'm all alone
dream of those days I wasnt
but for a moment in time
you an me were an item
that's for sure
you wrote that in wet cement
but shouldnt have been the
other way around
I do love you
you did love me too
didnt you?

Did you give up or did I
was it just impossible to be up against the sky
those forever moments get pretty heavy
when you think of it

so those moments of pure passionate joy
oh those feelings I'll never forget
even though now the feelings gone
even the tingle
doesnt feel like peppermint

so you know you'll always have a
secured place in my heart
and if I win the millions
i wont forget
all you did for me
even though what's natural
is hard to forget (or remember!)
because of your passion
i could live again
i could be a woman
in your arms of passion
i felt safe and warm
if only...
it would have worked out
without all those secret hidden doors
and what was that all about
some institution they never told me about?

Please remember this my dear
each night I say a silent prayer
that you'll remember me with love
and good feelings in your heart
because that is how I think of you
now and forever
like the moment we first met

about those long lost memories
way back when
decades ago
have loads of those lately
more than the laundry of yours i did
way back when
i still love you as I did
always will
what am I going to do
did i just want to collect you too?
for my man museum
dolls are a lot easier
maybe that's a good thing
cause men sure were easy
way back when

thankyou for bringing back that
i think i missed
more than
the desire
the desire for you
so much more than
what i could get
anywhere else
would mean nothing
if you werent always
somewhere there with me
why do i feel all amiss?

you saw the need
you knew the need
you vini vidi vici'd the whole thing
needing to primal
monkey tried to scream
happy the sad faced clown
maybe i already wrote to you
you're in all my songs
all in my life is merging
into one standard issue
as everything comes together
why wasnt i that special
women sure need more
you ran away from me
when all i wanted
i wanted you to tell me
why you ran
i knew by then it was all done

so you didnt think
you meant anything to me
when you were everything
to me then and now really
because you cant change that
it is like saying
i'm hungry
once the hunger is fed
you will get hungry again

whenever i am hungry
i think of you
and i have been hungry lately
hungry for your total needing me
a lady likes that
dont deny me that
you had real passion for me
that was rare for me
nobody ever did that
is that due to the fact
you're a spanish hot tamale?

so i had dreams then too
with you
what the future would be
but couldnt because
the desire died for me
men just seem to run out of steam
not your fault, really
not much i could do about this nature
i just had to work around it
i dont believe in synthetic world
remember; i like need

so when i left what the heck you do
did you do the neighbour
who screamed with so much more
pleasure than i ever could imagine
but then, if it were tom cruise
no i think she was fake as her
lust for you
as soon
as i left
so did she, right?

how do i know so much about men's desire
what they do, how they do it, how they lie
why they pretend and what they want

look, i've figured out
years of experience
years of trial and error
mostly error
that's just my way
if ying/yang works
i'm going to be coming up aces
ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh finally a triple header!!!

look you were too needy for me
and a flippant flipper
where would you go
what you would do
i didnt know
never would
you were as predictbly unpredictable
as my other was unedictably predictable
does this make sense
opposites yet still black haired
not since flocked haired Ken
has a big turn on been for me
is this called imprinting
or women sheepling? (I'll explain later)

long days ago i dont feel the same way now
i am ashamed that I didnt tell you
i had this dream of you and me too
that i wanted the best for you
but seems that life just didnt want to
give this to me
life is a gift
i didnt order
so how specific can I get
when I wanted you
you didnt want me
when I didnt want you
you wanted me

absense makes the heart grow fonder
at least it should
i have thought how are you
what are you doing now
are you still driving around
trying to find me

right here by me
you'd always be
there isnt that much
control for me
when i love its forever
hope you dont mind
sorry if this should not
put options out there
when they come crashing
in here (points to heart)
you remember
its not what you got
but man you sure got a lot
and i remember
those moments longingly now
that i have forgotten all
except you


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