Friday, May 29, 2009

awkward poem Yesterdays Dreams PITCH DITCH WITCH

Remember dreams from yesterday

days at the fair
laughing out loud
friends forever
lost never

hearts unravel
once binded hearts
with twineand romanced me
with fine wine
and romance
in Kleinburg

this sinew
i knew you
gritty stuff
like that
and all this reverent binding
of time and space
there were these
irreverant lashes
not suppose to be
how could they be
when never is never again
sinner designer label
used pennies and penance is never enough
bring back lost grace
and folds of newbeant skin
before sup
before the sun
rises up to sin

to bid adieu forever
we two
to take upon other distant direction
far shores a home
to find you there
safe and warm

without you all that you had meant
when i had sights on your designer sheets
and family jewls
to me it was meant to be
not to you
no not ever
i know now how men like to lie
always on top
you wouldnt get that
from me

hard won reality
i knew with you
it wasnt real
life seems to know that too
so why d'ya pretend
and break my heart
was I just a token embrace
a stolen throw away
not deserving of grace?

as a throw away
my shattered world
lost forever
in a sea of doubt to my integrity
trusting fools with rust

from that distance
a distant and lost shore
the other world
you know
mirrored reflections
and worlds
i'd never know

where i was to go
it wouldnt matter to you
i suppose
it'd be better
if i'd never
but i thought i was ever
your forever
some day

I'd keep thinking
there'd be you and me
yet i knew
that was never to be

to stave off the loser feeling
all would work out one day
saved by the magic prince

for now another bitter pill to pop
time was running out
destroyed, forsaken, writhing in pain
as all bleeding hearts do
when on the beach and left to die

wading in water
walking slowly away from the shore
where's my love gone
who stole my gown
now its all done
as the water makes her drown

until those mountains
came crash dieting
to the sea
to the sea
to renew
sailors mingle
at the whiskey bar
to loose the flesh
so heavily met
not heavenly scent
rottingdam it stinks
like beatniks
become invisible like litle tiny lights
brewed contortions these blues
with brazen distortions
whippets urgency
all men are dogs
to detailed substance
mass gravitates spiralled energies
synchronistically disembarking
rival spirit souls
and disemsembled semblance
in short order
coming up
this piecemeal hash
regurged from the last supper
the other night
another night to forget

all fell into
lost and grimey sea
a space of
grim and gin memories
too much for me at once
too much up old chuck
fellers from hellers kitchen
tobi's beach partakers
tied to dragon liars
got breached whale
sitting on
cement piers
tied to sinking ships
old masts tattered sails
how can i sail away
when i cant leave this shore?

peers old classmates
where are they now
certainly stuck in
those forever exams
hallways from hell

diet down
quiet now
remove that flesh
that binds
and confines
you to here
we all want floatation devices
to take us outta here

scattered bones
yards rolled out
under Paris' mean streets
decay at the end of the day
of things that once were
now dispersed to
the other ends of the universe
to think that maybe
dust just aint magic
when its dirt

the world to me now
a stone's throw away
from you
didnt always seem to be
so close yet so far
never appearing nearer
from yesterday

as today lingers on
like this poem
trying to be a song
reminds me of my wrongs
nothing i can do, or fix
when it is already missed

how to revive the dead
when I am one too
bring back to life
dreams that died long ago
in the backseat of the 69 Chevy
with you

farther then
the oldest father can see
trenched and rutted rot
all that had been bad
take me away from those
set it right
where to begin again
cover the uncovered sins
of a thousand yesterdays
sins never really go away
unless into
the sea of forgetfulness

if we'd ever be
all that i wanted us to be
to know
to feel
to be more real
that wasnt exactly the feeling
when emotions ran vacant
no vacancy at the inn
for some unknown reason
when everything is empty
vacant as the city parking lot
on monday night
lacking substance
holes seem everywhere
how to fill those abberant voids
of recurrent gray days
when life is closing in
cashing in on me somehow
how could i sell out
life always wins

was it just a lie
a joke
a con
a game?
all is lost on today
as I try to wrap
my head around
what really happened
when i realized
i'd never have
the right stuff

skipping on the ocean
hangin' by the beach
doin' the drag in a yellow corvette
roller skating to brown sugar
life just aint what it used to be
it's late
it's a quarter to two
finding that missing time peace
keeping up with you
that nice familiar beast
that took away my power base
how to get back to you
(why would I?)

going here and there
memories so rare
riding all over town
stopping in to chat with friends
all but for a moment
yesterday stole truehearted fools
from my soul create

today the world
scatters these memories
to the winds of flush
it is either in the toilet
or it is headed down the drain
round and round it goeslike a ferris wheel
of pain
to land one day without yourself
where did you go
when the dream of you and me
so did life as I knew it

remembering yesteday
hoping you'd let me in
so i can say goodbye
to all those happy dreams
that never could be

years we had together
those days now gone
refined memories so rare
of what i wanted to be
as far away as the stars

wishing we were where we once were
but never really were, were we?
here and now is all i know
its not much but its all there is
for me to hang onto
when you left me for dead
but that wouldnt be good enough
memories meant to forget
good intentions from the bad
maybe i shouldnt have
placed all my faith on a dream

once where we use to be and there
what would it be like
if you were still here
captured moments to hold onto
someone laughing at me
behind the scenes
maybe i'm not all that
i thought i'd crack up
to be

blah blah blah blah blah
dah dah dah dah dah
la de dah
and away she goes!

silly ditties for the potty trained


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